First National Bank

We’re flying around the Natal Midlands on the back of a British racing green Husqvarna buggy. The art director waves directions while my shot list flies in one hand with my 5DMKIII in the other. The two-toned farmer shouts over the khaki veld, “Bring in the Nguni’s!” Stylist Crystal Birsch, part-time Dramata Pro Arte, makes it her mission to keep us entertained. The client, Pia, just called me by my invoice line item, “zero-zero-five!”. Kate is production manager and proud Midlands native. Her attempt to draw out the fever tree thorn (which pushed through my white Converse) ends with a safety pin so deep in my heel that remembering even makes me wince. At night I dream that the FNB CEO was complaining about my Instagrams. Our PM dreamt that I sent her to Builders Warehouse for something for my kitchen. Pia dreamt that the PM was a raving Pokémon.

We’re holed up in a budget B&B in Ladysmith. I’m allocated a room with no windows except one that faces an indoor kitchen. I wake up through the night to the sound of truck drivers stirring cups of Five Roses. The punishing buzz called East Coast Radio plays through a cheap Chinese stereo creating a relentless tinsel echo over the tiled kitchen.

Our last shoot day is in Orlando, Soweto, where streets were designed by apartheid military to quickly triangulate areas in order to suppress civil unrest. A nearby charismatic preacher leads hymns so loud they could reach heaven. Television helicopters hover over us while I tether my Canon to my Macbook Air and debate Roarking and the cult of CrossFit.

Agency: Grid Worldwide / Nathan Reddy
Client: Pia Marangoni
Creative Director: Kirsten Townsend
Make-up Artist: Laura Kingma
Stylist: Crystal Birch